While some Australian teens face real hardship, many live in relative comfort, especially when compared to the 963 million people who go to bed hungry each night and the 150 million children under 14 engaged in child labour around the world.

“Try convincing my daughter of that!” one mum recently said to me. “She hasn’t stopped making demands since she woke up this morning!!” 

Parents regularly speak to me about their kids or teens shocking sense of entitlement. On a bad day, they feel like they exist to meet their teenager’s every whim, which is hardly an inspiring job description. On a good day, they are frustrated by their teen’s general disregard for time, money and effort. 

Why Do Our Kids Seem So Entitled?

Before we get up in arms about this generation, I’d like to stop and see the world through their eyes for a minute.

This is a generation that have been raised on filtered lives and curated success. Their social media feeds are overflowing with new shoes, smiling selfies, getaways, and “unboxing” videos and overnight success stories. 

What they see is fast, polished and immediate. However, it rarely shows the time it takes, the money it costs, or the effort it demands.

It’s no wonder they’re asking themselves:
Why can’t my life look like that?
What’s wrong with my family?
Shouldn’t I have more?

When “ordinary” life can’t compete, entitlement, comparison, and dissatisfaction move in. That’s why it’s more important than ever that we bring our teens back to real life – the kind that runs on effort, not algorithms. Where hard work meets outcomes, and the world is full of people who meet each of them through negotiations. 

Here are five everyday ways you can help them reset: 

IDEA 1: Make Room for Life Lessons

Small incidental lessons like the one I am about to share with you, are powerful ways of teaching teens respect.   Any instances where you are in the ‘driver’s seat’ are moments you can use to your advantage.  Here’s a great little example that shows how easy it is to teach your children that your time is valuable.

Daughter’s Text: I forgot my PE uniform and I really, really need it before class or I’ll be in big trouble. Please, please bring it to the office at lunchtime.
Mum’s Text: What’s in it for me? You’re interrupting my day.
Daughter’s Text: ummmm…
Mum’s Text: I need the washing done – three loads, hung out.
Daughter’s Text: Okay, I’ll do it tonight.
Mum’s Text: Deal.

This mum didn’t give in or guilt-trip. She calmly struck a fair deal and taught her daughter that her time has value. Instead of feeling resentful, she walked into the school office proudly and said, “I’m getting the washing done tonight for bringing this up!” The receptionist laughed and replied, “Good on you. You wouldn’t believe how many mums say it was their fault their kid forgot it!”

Takeaway: Let your time and effort mean something. When you give, create space for reciprocity – not resentment.

IDEA 2: Let Them Say No (to Themselves)

No one likes to hear the word ‘no’, so don’t say it. Let their own limits do the talking. 

One mum told me she gives her daughter a set allowance each week to cover entertainment and take-away food. That’s it. If she wants a burger after school, the answer is always:
“Sure darling. Got your money?”

It’s a simple strategy with powerful effects. Her daughter learnt to budget, prioritise, and sometimes – say no to herself.

Takeaway: Give them the responsibility, not just the request. Let them feel the consequences of their choices.

IDEA 3: Outsource Them 

There’s no better way to ground a kid or teen than helping them see how their work contributes to the world. Whether it’s cleaning, gardening, babysitting, or helping at a local shop, part-time jobs teach accountability like nothing else.

If you’d prefer they work for pay at home but are tired of nagging, try outsourcing. Have them mow a neighbour’s lawn or clean Grandma’s windows. Teens often work harder for people they’re not emotionally tangled up with.

Takeaway: Don’t just talk about the value of money – let them experience it.

IDEA 4: Delay the Yes

You don’t always need to say “no” but neither do we have to say “yes” straight away. Teens benefit from learning to wait, sit with uncertainty, and realise that their needs aren’t always the centre of urgency. 

One dad told me that when his son asked for new headphones, he simply said, “Let’s think about that. If you still want them in two weeks, we’ll talk.” In that time he wanted 20 different other things, which paled the headphones into a sea of priorities. Often, the impulse passes, and so does our kid’s request.

Takeaway: Teach patience by not jumping to meet every need. Let time separate impulse from priority.

IDEA 5: Give Them a Glimpse Behind the Curtain

Many kids are blind to what it takes to run a household. Bills, schedules, groceries, car servicing, dentist appointments. These are invisible loads, but can shape an entitled attitude if they aren’t seen, so try letting them in. Of course it must be age appropriate, and tailored to their capacity to contribute to the discussion, however there is merit in allowing them to see into adult responsibilities. 

One parent of a teenager held a ‘budget night’ where they showed their teen the weekly household expenses and then said, “Now you decide what we cut to afford your new shoes, or not.”  FYI, the teenager did already have a few pairs of shoes! 

Takeaway: A peek into real life can quickly shift their perspective. When they understand the effort behind the scenes, respect tends to follow.

IDEA 6: Teach Them to Acknowledge Effort

One dad told me he spent his entire weekend driving his son between sport, a birthday party, and the shopping centre. Not once did he hear a thank you. I can hear a roar from my parents community, who also feel the same lack of appreciation. I hear you parents! 

Instead of getting cranky or pulling back, try calmly saying, “I’m happy to help but I’d really appreciate a quick thank you. Relationships work best when they go both ways. Consider it petrol in my heart for next weekend…” It’s not about guilt-tripping but about giving them language for appreciation, and modelling what mutual respect looks like.

Takeaway: Expect gratitude and then gently invite it. Kids need to know effort deserves acknowledgment – even when it comes from us.

RECOMMENDED READING: You can find more on this topic in my book ‘Parenting Teenage Girls in the Age of a New Normal‘